Poochie Posted November 16, 2023 Report Posted November 16, 2023 NASA: "You’ve got to help us Tony. We need a man to go to Mars. We asked Stallone, Schwarzenegger, and The Rock. They all said the mission is too dangerous. Please help us out!" Tony: "First of all, don’t ask a candy ass to do a man’s job. I’ll handle it." The next day Tony shows up and they load his equipment onto the rocket. NASA: "Everything looks good except this case you have that says Acapulco Gold on it. You can’t bring that with you." Tony grabs a pre-rolled out of the case, strikes a kitchen match on his abs, and then blows smoke in the director’s face. Looks him in the eye with a Clint Eastwood squint and says, “let’s rock.” A few months later the rocket lands on Mars. As Tony steps out, he sees a Martian girl stirring a huge pot. Tony uses his famous pick-up line on her…. Tony: "Hey good lookin’. Whatcha got cooking?" Martian Girl: "Just watch." After she stirred for about 45 minutes, the most beautiful baby Tony ever saw crawled out of the pot. Tony is amazed and tells her so. Martian Girl: "How do they make babies where you’re from?" Tony felt it was his duty to demonstrate. Tony: "So that, little lady, is how it’s done on Earth." Martian Girl: "So, where’s the baby?" Tony: "It takes a few months." Martian Girl: "Then why did you stop stirring?" 5 Quote
