Well, for this week anyway.
Wife: I've had it with you! I can't believe you forgot my birthday for the fifth time! I think a divorce is in our future.
Husband: I'm sorry, dear. It won't happen again. I'll get you tickets for the upcoming NASCAR event. How's that?
Wife: You'll do better than that. I've been wanting my own race car for years. A fast one too.
Husband: You can't be serious.
Wife: Tomorrow afternoon, there better be something in the driveway that can go from zero to 200 in less than 5 seconds. Period!
Husband. Yes dear.
So the next day the wife comes home and sees a package in the driveway. Thinking it's the keys to a race car she opens it to find a bathroom scale.