IT Help

[PaulR]

Actual conversation from a help line

"Technical Desk, may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in Word, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type!"

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.

"Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

".......Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

"Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

"No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

[Porkchop]

i SO wish i could say something similar on a daily basis! too funny! hard to believe that something like this actually got said, but i guess i can fantasize

[Sanny]

That's the same lady who called to say her cup holder broke, right? The one that opens when she hit that little button in front?

[Curly]

That's the same lady who called to say her cup holder broke' date=' right? The one that opens when she hit that little button in front?[/quote']

Yeah, it was my darling wife on both counts

I guess I couldn't expect both beauty and brain, huh

[Guest]

Cup holder?? I guess I missed the first part.

[Sanny]

Cup holder?? I guess I missed the first part.

Doesn't your CPU have a cup holder? There's a little button in front, and when you push it, the little cup holder slides out for you to put your coffee in.

I must say, it's way more inconvenient in the tower types. When the CPU was left on the desk, under the monitor, it was much more conveniently located, put coffee right there on the desk. Now I keep having to reach down next to my chair each time I want a drink of coffee.

[Guest]

No wonder my Cd's won't work in it! Thanks for the heads up!

(couldn't resist using the little guy!) BTW, do they still refuse to let you pump your own gas in Jersey? What is that about??!!