Real Daddys Don’t Baby-sit

[Curly]

Here's a story about the precious little girl. No surgery involved in this one. I've got quite a few of these short stories and may have to post one once in awhile if ya'll don't liven up around here.

Real Daddys Don’t Baby-sit

When I get up and go to work the house is usually in pretty good shape and when I come home it looks about the same, so I know that Katie is not very messy. Can you believe Cathy actually wanted to get a maid to come in a few

times a week and help her out...give me a break. Cathy gets to spend a lot of time watching her shows on TV, napping, talking to her friends on the phone, going for leisure walks with Katie...such a blessed life...not at all

stressful like mine. And precious little Katie entertains herself all day without much parental guidance at all...she's a real angel. Boy I'd do that house-husband thing in a heartbeat. I'd love to have a relaxed life like Cathy has, but we men were created with that drive to conquer stuff, win ball games, be out there in the world doing it...women couldn't really handle that kind of pressure...they're way to weak and fragile for that! But that's how God made them so there's really nothing wrong with being weak...if you're a woman.

So the other day Cathy decided to go to her sisters for a day and take Katie with her. No way Hosea, you go and leave Katie with Papa and you and sissy have a great time. She was hesitant at first and actually talked about

getting a baby sitter to help me...GET REAL! This is my precious little Katie pie and I'm gonna bond ALL DAY with her! Wow, home all day with Katie having more fun than Mommy could ever imagine. She must love me so much to let me baby-sit Katie all day while she's with her boring sister.

Before Cathy even left I had already gotten everything ready, I'm very organized, ask Cathy. I lined up almost all of Katie's toys by the wall where I could watch her play while I lay on the couch. I had about 3 hours worth of good TV that I really wanted to watch while Katie played quietly, and then I was gonna play with Katie for awhile before she took her first nap. After that I was going to do a couple of man things around the house that I haven't had time to do. You know, build a birdhouse, do a little demolition here and there...typical manly week-end stuff. This was going to be a very productive day without Mommy pestering me all the time. And to really top it off, I was going to vacuum, do laundry, and clean the place up real good…you know, show that woman what a man can get accomplished in a day! I had a plan in my head and was going to stick to it. That's one of the major differences between me and Cathy, that's why I'm so productive and she's only semi-productive. I always have a plan, even if it's not written, and I follow it to the 'T', she just runs around like a chicken with her head cut off doing a little thing here and a little thing there...never really getting anything big accomplished. She's just barely able to keep the house in one piece and watch sweet little ole Katie. I guess God made women that way so that they wouldn't feel capable of getting a real job...that made it easier for them to stay home and do piddly things while the children play. If they have no drive or ambition then they will have no desire to have a real career. I have to keep telling myself that so I won't feel too superior to her...that sometimes has a negative effect on our relationship. Oh it doesn't bother me any but Cathy doesn't really like how superior I am...as a man. Well, God made me that way so I'm not at fault and I'm not gonna feel bad about it.

I couldn't wait to get down there and start playing with Katie but I needed to watch these three programs. There was one about landscaping, another about building decks and then one of those Scariest Police Chases shows. I'm very handy so I watch these shows all of the time, the police stuff is just pure entertainment. I usually catch a lot of boo-boos that the women make, they always have a man woman team on these home improvement shows to be politically correct, but I let it go...they're just women, how could they know this stuff...for gosh sakes it construction! But I really admire these women who at least try to learn man stuff, don't you?

Right after Cathy walked out the door I turned the TV on to the proper station, I had it written on my task list...part of my organizational skills I guess, it's like second nature to me to have all my ducks in a line. That's when Katie fell and hurt her knee, she cried and I had to go pick her up and walk around with her for fifteen minutes before she would quit crying. She must have really hurt herself. Oh well, she finally settled down, but I did miss some of the landscaping program...I'll catch the first part another time. Then Katie started crying for no reason at all, like she just wanted to be held or something...I had no idea what to do. But as you know by now, I'm pretty organized and I had a couple of bottles already made, management material wrote all over that boy, and I gave her one...and sure enough that was all it took, this is a breeze. Oh well, I'll get to see the last half hour of the landscaping show anyway, that's probably where the real meat of it is.

So Katie was just laying there as sweet as could be with the bottle in her mouth, this was a piece of cake, and her face was turning kinda red...that's when I smelled it. Gracious girl, how can a smell that big come out of a teensey weensey little girl like you. We have got to change that diaper NOW. So I took her into the changing table we have set up in the living room, but there were no diapers and I ended up having to take her to her bedroom. I looked all over the place and ten minutes later I found where Cathy keeps the diapers, I'm gonna have to organize this stuff because I seem to be the only one in the household with good organizational skills...but I'll do that another day because it's not on my task list for today...which, by the way, I'm already behind on...but surely I'll catch up.

I don't know what she must of eaten or if her stomach was just messed up or what but that stuff was coming out of the legs of her diaper and had gotten on her pants and everywhere, and it was a color I’d never seen before. Of course, she had to keep reaching down there to grab handfuls while I wrestled with her trying to get her clean and changed...so I ended up having to just give her a bath. I needed one too but had to just wash my hands real good and quickly change out of my soiled clothes. After I bathed her it must of taken a full half hour to get the area around the changing table cleaned off. This was as bad as the time she took off her diaper and rubbed do-do on everything. But Dads on the job, things are well in hand.

So, we get back down to the den, and unfortunately the landscaping show was finished and there was about thirty-five more minutes or so left of the deck building show. That's the one I really wanted to see, I probably know more

about landscaping that most of those dorks on TV anyway. So as soon as I sit down I hear this big clunk-clunk-clunk...three very distinct sounds and then I hear the worst yelling I've ever heard in my life. So I run into the

kitchen and Katie was laying there by the stairs having a fit, she was rolling over and yelling and doing her hands back and forth like I've never seen her do before. Someone had apparently left the baby gate open, possibly me since Cathy is not here, and Katie had gone up three or four steps and somersaulted backwards down the stairs. Bless her little heart, her lip was bleeding and swelling a little. She was trembling so she must have really been hurt...that girl doesn't cry to get attention she only cries when she's really hurt bad. So I held her for the longest time, she really needed me to get over this. Had her arms around my neck real tight, which she doesn't do often so I had to take advantage of that. When I gently tried to set her down she would start to whimper a little so I just let her stay there as long as she wanted.

She finally started to settle down so we walked back into the den just when the deck building show was going off but they had a toll-free number to call if you wanted to order the video so I wrote the number down...that's better

anyway because I can watch it at my own pace. And if I need to watch one specific part of it three times, I'll rewind it and watch it three times. But I really did want to see the Scariest Police chases, I had seen some of the commercials and it looked pretty awesome. So I was going to put Katie down on the floor and go to the bathroom before the program started, but first we walked around and made sure both baby gates were closed and all of the

doors were closed. I'm very organized and didn't want to leave any stones unturned…this time! So all was in place and I set her down while I went to the bathroom and she was fine, of course, what did you think?. When I got back

I settled down on the couch and Katie was rubbing her eyes...which is a sure sign that she will be asleep in about two minutes. So I thought I'd take her upstairs real quick, put her to bed and run back down for the entertainment.

Up we go for nap time. Well, she didn't want to go right down for some reason so I sat in the rocker with her and gave her the bottle. She must have been extra thirsty because she finished it all up and wanted more. She has a small

appetite so anytime she wants more to eat or drink we quickly abide. I sat her down by her toys and ran down stairs to fix her another bottle, of course I closed the baby gates...I'm not that crazy! I couldn't have been gone more than a minute or two at the most but when I got back she was not in her room. I ran down the hall and the only door that was open was the door to my office. When I got in there she had pulled every single book off of the bottom two shelves of my book shelf. Man, I had those books all organized by category, it would take me forever to get that stuff back the way it was. Oh well, come on Katie girl, let's go back to your room and finish the new bottle and take your nap. Guess what, she doesn't seem to be thirsty anymore nor does she want to sleep. She wants to play in her room. Well, that's OK, she'll get sleepy in a minute or two!! We played for forty-five minutes at least. I had to read her every book she handed me, at least five times while she shook her head 'NO' like I was getting the words wrong or something. The nerve of that girl, I'm her Dad for goodness sakes! But she finally got sleepy enough and let me put her in her crib. She hugged Molly real tight and snuggled up to her with this huge smile on her face. Katie loves

her naptime!.

Oh well, the police show was finished but at least I could start on the birdhouse, that was the ONE thing that I absolutely wanted to get done today! The last I saw of my task list was when Katie was teething on it but I can't seem to find where it ended up, I guess we'll see in 24 hours if she ate it. That's where the measurements and supply list for the birdhouse is. I'm very organized, so I like to get all of my tasks, needed supplies, measurement, etc. all in one place...wherever that may be! For some reason I had gotten a bit sleepy so I thought I'd shut my eyes for about fifteen minutes and then get up, redo my birdhouse specifications and break ground. It was 11:30am, I would get up by 11:45am and begin. Katie's baby monitor woke me. She was up there crying for some reason, I couldn't figure out why she woke up so quickly..then I looked at the clock, it was 1:27pm. Well, at least Katie (and I) got a good nap! I'll go get her up and take her down to the basement and let her watch her Daddy build a birdhouse. She's gonna be very proud of her Daddy.

For whatever reason, Katie is scared of the basement, it was the darndest thing. I didn't think that girl was scared of anything but she absolutely would not let me take her down those steps. She cried big ole tears as I assured her there

was nothing to be afraid of but the further down the stairs we got the louder she got. She was trying to climb over my shoulders and get back up those stairs away from that basement. So back up we went. When I set her down

she went right over to the table and started pushing one of the chairs. That eighteen pound baby pushed the chair into the kitchen, up to the counter, climbed up on the chair and got the phone. The phone wasn't ringing or anything she just grabbed it and put it to her ear and started babbling. If that ain't genetics I don't know what is!!! I have pictures of the whole event!

We played for a long time, I tried to get a few things done but about as soon as I'd get halfway started on something I'd have to go find her or help her, or something, man, she is into everything! She wanted to go outside and would not take 'NO' for an answer so I got her wagon and took her around the neighborhood until she started getting fussy. I figured she may be hungry so back home we went to get her bottle. She drank the entire bottle, before long she's going to be a twenty pounder. We had pretty much messed up every room, stuff was everywhere so I was going to straighten up a bit, put the dishes in the dishwasher and run it. Just get things in order a bit because, well, you know how organized I am. I really wanted to show Cathy how productive she could be if she just put her mind to it. She should be able to keep this place spic-n-span with minimal effort.

That's when the door opened. My eyes must have been wide open when I looked at Cathy and then at the clock. It was already 5:30pm and I had not done a single thing on my task list, where was that list anyways? I ran over and

hugged Cathy for the longest time. I started rattling on about this and that and telling her about my day and what all Katie had done, the bloody lip...everything! It was great talking to someone who spoke English and really understood what you were saying. Someone who could sit down for minutes at a time without you having to go looking for them, or soothe them, or get them something, or play with them! Someone you can sit quietly with, without having to wonder when the next toy will come flying at your head!

You know, I'm not so sure about that weaker sex thing I briefly mentioned earlier. I think God made us different surely, but certainly not one weak and one strong, just different. God had to give women great strength to be

able to run around all day chasing a little one, and some people even have more than one…God help ‘em. Boy, that's an exhausting task! And all of the organizational skills in the world, and everybody knows how good mine are right, can't get things done when your precious child needs your attention. God gave women a great desire and love that allows them to turn their backs on wondrous careers because they would rather stay home and help their little ones through all of those tough parts of life, teaching them every day. Stressful, man tell me about it! My work day is a cake walk compared to what I've been through today. But I love my wife and I think I'd go through this entire ordeal again for her one day...after I'm all rested up, but right now I 'm going to go take a nap before dinner...I feel a bit fragile and weak for some reason!

I'm really proud of how well Cathy keeps our house together and watches out for Katie, thank God she only got up a few stairs today before she fell. I really need to start talking to the neighbors so I can get some references. We're going to be getting a maid! And at least once or twice a week Cathy needs to get a sitter just so she can go out and do something with another adult...not grocery shopping, not returning items for a refund, just something fun! Maybe I was set up, maybe not! But as a friend once told me, real Daddy’s Don't Baby-sit, they participate in the raising of their children!

Mar 14, 2000

[Sanny]

You're a good bunny, Curly dear.

[samantha]

training curly

Wow...the wife and daughter really know how tag team this guy...I love it. Wait till this girl is a teenager....I'm laughing already.

[gerard]

Curly, too bad you've already had a vasectomy, cause it's your ovaries that are ruling you.

[Curly]

Gerard, you're just jealous cause I got all the chicks eating outta my hand now.

[gerard]

Gerard' date=' you're just jealous cause I got all the chicks eating outta my hand now. [/quote']

Better count your fingers, one of 'em is an attorney.

[Curly]

Eeek

Dang Sanny, come on now, what did you do with my finger?

[Majestik]

Good thing my wife doesn't read this board, Curly...

...I'm still trying to convince her she just needs to be a little more organized...

hehe.

[samantha]

post dated photo

Curly is that a futuristic photo? It is dated for 9/8/06. Nice organization!

[ThreeDJ16]

Re: post dated photo

Curly is that a futuristic photo? It is dated for 9/8/06. Nice organization!

There are a lot of places that use day, month, year (Europe) as opposed to our normal month, day year and therefore some cameras and equipment have the setting for either. Not sure if that was the case here, but it could be. But either way, your right, Curly is a backwards kinda guy - hehe.

-=Jasen=-

[Curly]

Hey, I'm not technical enough to get it to mm/dd/yy OK

But as you can see, heavy domes can smash fingers